Cars Are Faster Than Wagons
by mysoxlike2party
Summary: Ai and the gang switch their mode of transportation to and from the human world, because everyone knows cars are faster than wagons, no matter how mad Wanyuudo's head looks on the wagon wheel.


**Anime**: Jigoku Shoujo  
**Rating**: K+  
**Warnings**: None I suppose?  
**Pairings**: None.  
**Disclaimer**: Obviously don't own Hell Girl  
**Notes**: Boredom. Similar to previous story, "New Computer Lifestyle", where they replace their computer, but here, they replace their mode of transportation...

* * *

"I am so late." Ai said to herself inside the wagon she uses for her job as the Hell Girl. "Go faster, Wanyuudo."

"I'm one head!" He said angrily.

The Hell Girl sighed. She is late, yet again, for another Hell Correspondence call.

_It's this stupid wagon. Who even uses wagons anymore? What are we, medieval? _She thought. _Or maybe it's just that Wanyudo's slow because he's elderly, therefore he can't make the wagon go as fast as it should._

Once the Hell Correspondence call was done, she went back to her eternal twilight home. Ichimoku Ren, one of Ai's faithful assistants, noticed her glum expression. Well, she's always glum. She was just _glummer_ today. Is that even a word?

"Why so glum, Miss?" Asked a concerned Ichimoku Ren. Ai sighed.

"Wanyuudo's old." She said. Ichi blinked and stared at her for a bit.

"Barely noticed, Miss?"

"He's old, so he's slow, so the wagon I use for transportation to the Hell Correspondence call is way below optimum speed." She explained.

"That's a good observation, Miss. And how do you want to take care of that problem?"

"Ichimoku, do you have a drivers license?" She asked.

"Huh? Er, well..."

* * *

Ai's computer lit up with the Hell seal. Time for work. Cue the dramatic hair flipping, kimono slipping, scene. But this time...

A honk sounded two times. Ai whirled around to see a brand new Loyota Tamry parked next to her pond. Ichimoku stepped out of the new car and twirled the keys around his fingers.

"Let's go." He said, ever so cooly. Ichi opened the passenger side door and let Ai step in. She began feeling the seat.

"Leather... so comfy, unlike the wooden bench I would sit on in the wagon..." She murmured.

"Yup! Cappuccino, Miss?" Said Ichi, handing her a fresh Cappuccino. "Built in cappuccino maker. Nifty, eh?"

"Very nifty." She said, taking a sip. The sound of the two backs doors closing shut cued Moku to start the ignition.

"Can't you two get here faster?" Complained Ichi, putting it in drive.

"Oh just GO!" Whined Hone Onna. "And gimme a cappuccino!"

"Too late, Miss Ai just took the last morsel."

"It's hot in here." Complained Wanyuudo, lowering his window.

"No, put you're window up! I'll turn on the AC." Said Ichi.

"Step on it, Moku." Demanded Ai. Ichimoku stepped on the pedal, causing the tire to burn rubber on Ai's grass. Ichimoku headed towards the eternal sunset in the background.

"Check the speedometer, Miss!" Said Ichi.

Ai peered at it. "60 kilometers. You can go faster. Wanyuudo's top speed was 80."

Ichimoku lowered the gear shift and the speedometer's needle went rising. Soon, they reached the eternal sunset...

* * *

The teenage boy was browsing the internet on his computer when a colossal boom shook his room and caused his ceiling fan to fall down. He shrieked and turned around to find a car had crashed through his wall. Making their grand entrance, the four car doors opened simultaneously. The boy stared in awe as Ai and her companions came out of the car like celebrities. They closed their door one after the other.

"Hello." Greeted Ai.

"H... H... Hi..." Stuttered the boy. The car's headlights flashed once and beeped as Ichi locked the doors with the car's key chain remote. "Uuuhhh..." The boy couldn't help but stare. What an ODD scene indeed.

"If you truly detest your mother, then pull the scarlet thread from this straw man's neck, and venegance will be served accordingly." She said, putting her hand out for Wanyuudo to transform into the straw doll in her hand. She waited. "Accordingly." She repeated. Ichimoku checked his watch while Hone Onna adjusted her kimono. "Wanyuudo!" She hissed.

"O-Oh! Sorry Miss!" He apologized, promptly transforming into the straw doll. Ai handed him the doll.

"The rest is up to you." She said quickly, then walked back to the car. Ichimoku unlocked the doors. Ai and Hone Onna went inside the car, slamming the doors behind them. The teenage boy clutched the straw doll, still staring in awe. The car accelerated through the other wall, creating yet another hole. The teenage boy noticed the license plate on the car's back, which had the plate number 'H311 G1R1'. He smiled slightly, then looked at his straw doll, then looked at the second hole on the wall.

"If their gonna leave me holes in my walls everytime they come I'm gonna stop callin' them over!" He said, irritated, resuming his internet browsing despite the fact that his room had two gigantic holes that are probably irreparable.

* * *

**[[Abrupt ending, yes. This is where my mind stopped.]]**


End file.
